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My Husband’s Communication is Poor

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

I need your advice concerning my marriage. Yesterday, I listened to the audio you made which you talked about communication. Everything you said is the exact problem I have been trying to solved for 4 years now. When I met my man he was the cool type when he’s always around me but later I got to find out that he is loud and friendly when he’s with his friends.

So it got to a time, I decided to tell him about how he lacks in communication with me but he told me I can also bring out a topic for us to discuss. I tried that method but whiles I’ll be busy talking his attention will be either on the tv or mostly on his phone. He can even get a call and walk out without saying anything to me. He will move to the bedroom when I’m together with him in the living room or vice versa.

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We spend little time together in the house because of our work schedule. The only time he’ll try to be caring and friendly is when he needs sex that day but after the sex, he’ll turn back to be the old him and avoid me. When he calls me on the phone, he’ll be like, “how are you? Ok if you’re fine then I only called to check up on you.” That is it. Nothing more.

I tried again to let him know am not comfortable with it all but nothing is working. Auntie Abena, will you believe that yesterday evening when you started the audio, I called him to let us listen to your message because he was in his good terms and trying to lure me with sex. But he asked me that why am I trying to change him because those words can’t change him or anything so I should let him live his free life and how he’ll be comfortable with it. I was so much hurt and didn’t prolong issues, I just slept.

The truth is I am not happy at all. I always question myself that so am I going to stay in this marriage without communicating and be unfriendly with him like this forever? I’m tired of always being cheerful only around my kids and co-workers and friends. I need him so badly because I love him very much and I just want him to change. I feel lonely and thinking a lot each day. I’m afraid for the future because what if a different man tries to give me all the attention that I need?

Please what can I do to turn it all around for me to be happy. Kindly help me out. God bless you.

Want to share your story anonymously? Kindly send a mail to manokekame@gmail.com

https://abenamagis.ga/anonymous/am-i-being-insensitive-and-unreasonable/

Written by Abena Magis

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