DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
God bless you so much. Please I want to comment on the nurse who takes 7 cedis as TNT story.
Auntie Abena it may look like a joke but it’s real. I was in the same situation but things have changed now. In the name of “your money is our money” I gave my husband my ATM card. I’m a salaried worker, but this man misused the money so I took it back peacefully.
He later convinced me to go for a loan for business to support the house since he didn’t have a stable job. I did. Later he convinced me to go for another loan for a car, I did too. Hmmmm, but you should see the kind of family I come from, very poor background. Sometimes my husband would tell me I should not be spending on my family else I will be late in making it in life.
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I tried all I could to be a better help to him but after it all he never respected me. He could give me cheeky answers in front of others and got angry when I made a suggestion about my own salary.
It was hell for me.
We had a baby and I was the one doing everything for the child. I only asked my husband for money when I was broke and that always resulted in chaos. Mind you, because of work we weren’t staying together.
Auntie Abena my husband later took a decision (during the lockdown) that I shouldn’t touch my salary anymore but should ask him for anything I needed, even pad. Someone who complains when I even ask him for a small support. I knew him so I didn’t agree and that brought out the worst treatment from him.
I started growing lean and couldn’t tell anyone my issue. Even the business we opened, he didn’t talk of the profits or loss unless I asked. The answer was always “business is bad.”
As a salaried worker, I couldn’t boast of 100 cedis savings because the loan deduction was too much and I was doing everything for myself and our child. Also, he was always angry with me for not saving my money for the use of the home and would be comparing me to the wives of his friends that they were doing better than me. I suffered depression because in his eyes I was useless..hmmmm
My family saw how I was growing lean. They asked questions but I lied. I realized I had to open up because I was losing myself. I opened up to a member of my family my husband respected very much and since then things have changed.
Auntie Abena, I would like to advise working women, especially salaried working women to be careful whom to help as a wife. Not all husbands are appreciative and most of them become irresponsible when the woman is capable. Some are really taking responsible women for granted.