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I’m Paying Him Back for the Humiliation

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

Happy new year and God bless you and mano fans soo much. I have been one of your silent fans but I need your loyal mano fans to advise me.

It all started about 8 years ago when I met a young pastor who introduced me to Christ and I ended up joining his church. We became friends for 2 and a half years. I fell in love with him but I didn’t tell him about it. He later found out and asked me through a whatsapp text which I confirmed.

Auntie Abena, I wished I never did because the humiliation and the hurt after that has been more than I could bear. Not knowing he showed the text to his general overseer and even his colleagues pastors. I don’t know why he did that because he rejected me and gave me so many reasons why he can’t fall in love with me which I accepted that day and never spoke about my feelings again.

READ ALSO: Are My Reasons Good Enough to Divorce Her?

Some of his pastors were even preaching with it but I didn’t know because I thought he was my pastor and a close friend too until our general overseer started calling me to give me advise, telling me none of his pastors deserve a lady like me so I shouldn’t think of going out with any of them. I was really confused about this statement until one day I went out with one of our lady pastors whom through conversation told me everything. She told me how he would even give the phone to them to chat with me instead of him chatting me. That’s when I started putting the pieces together.

I was soo hurt and betrayed but I never left the church. I got admission to a nursing school which I completed 3 years ago nd now working but auntie Abena the problem now is the same man of God who rejected me some years back, came back to me 2 years ago to apologise and told me he is interested in me. I accepted him and we have been dating for almost 2 years now.

We are supposed to get married this year March but I have realised I was never interested in him. I just wanted him to feel how I felt some years back. Meanwhile he is busily planning for the wedding.

Auntie Abena please how do I tell him I was never in love with him and just wanted to pay him back for what he did to me without feeling quilty? Thank you.

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Written by Abena Magis

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4 Comments

  1. You let ur emotioms lead u and became like him bwcuase what he did is what u r also doing is going to hurt him(did u think about that?) And its going to cause alot of problems jxt dnt think about what happened cause we can all be immature in our own ways sometimes so please learn to forgive and learn to love him

    • Talk to him about it(about what He did) and ask him why he did so because u should use this to learn so that mistake is not repeated again and move of after u know what he did u can take a good decision from there cause u might do this and later regret later.So please talk to him and ask his reasons and u guys forget it and move on after that cause I dnt think this revenge thing suits u

      • Henry, immaturity is not about age oooooooo, he just felt big and wanted to gain some recognition cus a woman had proposed love to him. What if the lady had committed suicide after all that humiliation. Would he have come back to marry her now? That was total stupidity on part of the guy. Look it’s now the guys have to accept proposals from ladies cus it’s not easy for a lady to come out boldly to propose to a guy. We are in the 21st century and must behave as such. Thank you

  2. These are some of the foolish men who in a way make women think they are too spoilt to express their feelings towards their male friends. I am a man and I side with you to go ahead and do what you plan doing. When next he is able to revive from the shock, he will learn to respect the feelings of women. I personally side with you 100%

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