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I Want to Give My Baby to Another Man

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

Please post for me for advice. I want to be sure what I’m about to do is the right thing. I’m a national service personnel currently and I would be 24 this year.

This is my story.
I’m the only child of my mother. She actually had fertility issues and according to her she even suffered before having me. When growing up, any issue I had be it white or kooko (bleeding piles) my mom would attribute it to fertility. It was either this ailment could be a hindrance to giving birth or something else.

Growing up it felt to me like she was kind of projecting her fertility issues on me. It was like because she had problems then I might too. This got me really scared. There was one-time, she passed a comment that I should have a child and she’d care for it for me before she joins her ancestors.

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So for me, when other girls my age were scared of getting pregnant, I was rather scared I may not be able to conceive. Hmm, I tried with two guys that I dated in the past but nothing and I got really scared. So with this third guy I wasn’t even in a relationship with him but I got pregnant. I can’t even recall how it all started.

I did it with every vim because I thought my mom said she’d care for my child. Now the woman says no. Eii. The guy too initially said he’s not ready so I should abort it but I said no. In fact everyone around me said I should abort it but Auntie Abena I just cadn’t. Now the guy says he’ll support me but he’s only earning GHS500gh a month so he gives me GHS100 monthly. He’s done that for two months now.

Now my issue is, I’ve met another man. He’s already married but says he wants to take care of all my needs, antenatal and everything but unless I agree to marry him and he would also adopt my baby when it’s born. Manofans I don’t like the idea but I really really need the support too.

After weeks of thinking about it, I’ve finally decided to do it.
Am I doing the right thing by giving another man’s child to another person? Please I want advice on what I should do or how I should go about it. I’m currently in another region because of national service so I’m not staying with my mom.

Want to share your story anonymously? Kindly send a mail to manokekame@gmail.com

Written by Abena Magis

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