DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
I believe you are doing well. I’m hurting and I need your help. There is this girl I met late 2015, we became friends and then later it went further into dating. We are age mates, 27. She’s beautiful and in fact she dey love me waa. I love her too but the problem is, she is kinda too strict on me and also has anger issues.
She can’t control her anger one bit, and also she is the jealous type. In fact SUPER jealous.
Initially with the restriction thing, I thought it was normal but it kept on getting worse.
There was this day I went to watch a football match on TV at a friend’s house. This girl called me and when she realized my voice was relaxed, she started yelling; “where are you?”
I replied I’m at a friend’s house watching a football match. She then asked angrily, “Which of your friends? I know all your friends. Why is it that I don’t know this one. Gyae saa nsɛm hunu no. You better tell me the truth. Fa phone nu manu na me no ɛkasa. (Give the phone to your friend and let me talk to him).” I had to give the phone to my friend for her to talk to him. Many similar scenarios has happened.
The many restrictions were just too much for me so I cheated but she found out. That day she nearly went mad. I chopped slaps too. The pressure that day err, hmm only God knows.
Things began getting worse and worse. I read about “OBSESSION” online and I was convinced that she was obsessed with me and not in love. Because everything about obsession was her.
I confronted her but it resulted into an argument.
In fact we argue almost everyday. There was this time we had an argument (at her place), she locked me up in the room from morning till 1pm. I had to find my way out and run away when she went to the bathroom. We stay at different places. I usually go to her place on Friday evenings after work and return on Monday morning. She comes to my place too.
Just some few weeks ago another argument came up around 4:30am Monday morning when I was about to leave for my place for work. She wanted to lock me up in the room again but this time around I resisted. I managed to run.
Just when I was about to reach the station, I saw her coming from behind me looking angry. She started yelling at me but I had to pretend we were playing because we were outside and few people were around. I’m not trying to make her look bad but Aunty I just have to say it just the way it is. She’s a nice person at heart though but this side of hers is just something else.
Just today my girlfriend posted the picture of the girl I cheated on her with, on her status. Threatening that she’ll kill her whenever she sees her. And that she’s not happy in her relationship because of that girl. That she’s ready to go to jail because of her.
Auntie I’m confused and just don’t know what to do. i’m thinking of leaving this relationship but I fear she might do something ‘stupid’ because she’s been saying “Mɛ bɔ wo dua ɛkum wo na me nso mɛ kum me ho (I’ll curse and kill you and also kill myself).” Especially when she’s angry. Aunty I want to leave peacefully but don’t know how.