DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
Not every woman wakes up one day and decides to hide money from her husband without a very good reason. In my case my mother had to do it to avoid shame and I’ll follow in her footsteps until I’m sure the man I marry can be trusted.
Mum has always sold at the market and we her 3 kids are proud of it because that’s what she used to take care of us through school and even built the house we are living in. Dad is a graduate and if I tell you the way he used to talk to mum’s brothers (my uncles) you’ll shock. Not everyone is privileged to go to school or even have the interest in it. I’ve 2 uncles who are welders and 1 who is a sprayer but they have built their own houses and taking care of their families.
Anytime dad got into a fight with mum and they came in, he always told them he doesn’t quarrel with illiterates. This affected the closeness between mum and them until before our grandfather got sick and died, he called all his kids to forgive each other and let the past be in the past. Blood is thicker than water and nobody should break that family bond.
What pained my uncles was that, when mum first had her store when we were little, she could have helped their children with their school fees but dad who was managing it run the store down while mum was trying to set up another store at another place. She couldn’t use the capital for the new place to help them and dad wasn’t being friendly to them but they saw him changing girlfriends. They told her and she couldn’t do anything because her business was also important. Because of this they thought she was being wicked.
Dad drove a deep wedge between my uncles and us (we’re 3, I’m the eldest) too. Always telling us to not mix with riff raff. He’s the only one I’ve heard using that insult and always made my uncles seem like some bad people who always wanted to take mum’s money from her. Mum bought 2 Sprinter buses for him to drive. Ask me where they are. The first one got spoilt in the bush somewhere after helping some galamsey people and he never went back for it always giving excuses. The second one he came to say armed robbers but the rumours are that he sold it. We don’t know what he used the money for.
Mum at a point got fed up telling him how much she’s making or coming home with money because he’ll only steal from her bag. Since 10 years ago, she started doing susu and also kept some of the money with me when she comes home. She always complained to dad about business. She told him she couldn’t keep on renting the place he run down and closed it. She claimed later the landlord sold it but didn’t tell dad she was the one who bought it. The other place she didn’t rent again but focused on the first one.
After school, I told dad that I want to work and make some money. I’m managing mum’s store but he thinks I’m working for someone. Anytime he asks me about my pay, I tell him the GHS200 I’m paid a month is what I’m saving to school. Mum pays me very well but I won’t give him any of my money because he doesn’t do anything except drink all day, all night.
Mum said she’ll never divorce him but she moved back to the family house before moving to the place she’s built. Dad knows she’s living in a chamber and hall but doesn’t know all the 6 chamber and hall on that 2 plots belong to mum. He’s living with his girlfriend that he introduced as his wife though he hasn’t married her and taking care of her 2 kids as if they’re his kids. The woman doesn’t want us to come close to her and her kids but we meuve.
Mum told me her Will can never include him. I have all these information because she confides in me and says that if dad gets his hands on her properties, he’ll use it to take care of another woman’s kids.
I’m 26 now o but still not interested in dating. I want to acquire all my properties before a man comes into my life and comes to flex me. #MoL #MoneyOverLove